I'm feeling ....
More to follow....
I'm back, but paying for my time still (pfthth). Thanks for the understanding guestbook messages! We normally really like AOL and BT so unless this is unresolvable or we finally snap or something (!!) we will be staying with both, but thanks Laura-Ann for letting us know how groovy NTL is! :) We may try them if all else fails.
Wellll right now we are downloading a firewall from the internet, which we (allegedly) need in order to fix our internet problems. So of course we can only get online now with the costly dial-up thingy, and the firewall is taking hoooouuurs to download (over an hour so far). So I thought I might as well be using the internet while it downloads. Also we had to reinstall AOL because the computer forgot it ever existed today (?!!), and I have lost all trace of every single email I've ever had (including all email addresses, waaaahhh!!). Grrrr. But oh well, what can you do.
Neil is watching some war movie about 2 feet away from me which is kind of distracting! It makes all my thoughts feel all scattered and jumbled, and I don't feel as easy getting all feelingsy with a load of distraction in the background.
But I wanted to write because Cameron's mum phoned me today. We talked for an hour and four minutes. I need to write about it and what I felt and pretty much everything that she said word-for-word (you know how I like to include plenty of detail), but I can't do it with all this shooting and yelling in the background. Urgh.
So another time.
My overlocker arrived yesterday, the one I won at eBay. I haven't done any sewing with it yet though. I've had no urge to sew since I satisfied my sewing craving a few days ago.
Why are war films even made? They are so stupid and pointless. For five minutes solid, there has been nothing but gun fire. Stupid guns. Stupid war. Stupid people finding it entertaining. (of course my husband is included in this group since he loves war movies, and he's not stupid, but urgh it's a major peeve to me all the same)
We are having chicken and leek pie tonight. Yummy. I have horrible IBS. Yesterday and today I have been soooooo nauseous. I have to pace while I watch the TV because I feel soooo sick I just can't sit still :( I know it's IBS because it's all too familiar, and I have a huge swollen tummy and all that normal jazz. But this happens, and at least it hasn't been going on for weeks. I also have hayfever. Weird! It started when I was writing my last diary entry at 1.10am, and it has been carrying on ever since - now what is that about?!! I have nooo idea what has triggered it (as usual). Neil says I snored last night!
But good news - I got my immune system / hormonal balance supplement!! I started taking it yesterday. So let's hope that regulates my PMS and all the other stuff I was hoping it might do. Did I ever put a link to the website here? I think I did in my other diary. Sorry if I didn't - I remember Valerie asked me for info, so sorry it's taken me this long! Anyway the website is here. The supplement I'm on is the endocrine balancing one. We'll see how / if it helps.
They're wading through reeds holding guns on the TV. Blech.
Cameron's angels (the glass one and the cream one with the lovely note from his family) have been stolen from his grave. How much does that suck? I am so shocked about that. But his mum says it is a risk and seemed to half expect it. How much do people suck if they can take a beautiful sculpture off a child's grave with a note attached to it saying how much his parents love and miss him? I hate people sometimes.
Much violent gunfire and people dying with screams and wails on the TV. How is this entertainment? I usually stay far away from the TV when Neil watches stuff like this. Yuck.
Woohoooooooo, the firewall is finished!!!!!!!!!!! Yay! So I know this entry has been a bit short and weird and un-newsy, but I need to stop now so that I can change the settings on the firewall to stop it blocking AOL, and then restart the computer and PLEEEAASE God let this whole palava be sorted out so we can use the internet without further stress!!
So I will hopefully be back soon to write a huge entry like I normally do! :)
Cameron's first anniversary - 2004-09-24